Extended winter blues

I miss my little white cottage in the wet, green space where red birds used to come down each day to serenate my hours. Small, low ceilings, and white all over. How cozy, and sunny it always felt, and how my soul misses it here in our large, tall-ceiling cold home where icy dark winter days kept stretching and widening throughout my days, throwing dark shadows upon my head. I’ve been sleeping in the smaller upstairs room, so that my soul can wrap itself in gentle coziness during cold nights, and it is been good—good to rest upon cozy shadows and dimmed lights, lower ceilings and white comforters. I’ve been making hearty soups in the evenings and toasting cranberry-walnut bread to accompany it. Nights are long and the sound of frizzing rain pitter-pattering on peat gravel outside seems to be singing a mournful quiet song. I got my book published this past week, and the amaryllis by the kitchen window has opened, and it sits in front of me laughing at my enthusiasm. Dead leaves have found a permanent home on the back porch, so it seems, and they will remain there until the sun comes back or until I can find my soul back.

“Melancholy were the sounds on a winter's night.”
― Virginia Woolf

January

I have never liked January.  

Never liked a day without sun...

Never have I ever been fond of winter, or winter activities, cold days, windy days and thick coats that make you feel fat and uncomfortable.  If I ever did enjoyed winter, it would have to be those mild winters when we lived in the south where winters where always a welcoming blessing in every aspect of the word.  Always sunny by mid-day and beautiful perfect days by the end of February.  Short and pretty...

Here, my experience had always been a January of bad colds and the flu, it had been food poisoning and strep throat, pink eye, irritated eyes, dry eye, a cough that won’t stop, wheezing, fatigue, and chest tightness, chest congestion, earache, and headaches.  I don’t…. I just don’t like January at all.  Simply put, January depresses me.  It always had.  So after three weeks of not feeling well, I’m slowly starting to lift up my head out of the pit again… I think.  So this morning I cleaned and redecorated the upstairs room and bathroom, where both, the Fisherman and I have been living and nursing our miseries for the past few miserable nights…  

It feels so good to see this room sanitized and fresh again.  I even decorated this corner here a little different this time!  As you can see, my soul is craving green green... with all this amount of white going on outside...

My little jungle corner in the kitchen area, where most of my plants live got cleaned up a bit too.  When you have so many plants together in one place, they can make such a leafy mess… dried petals, stems, leaves, even water stains get to paint floors and accumulate behind pots and furniture… so it was about time…  

This little panda planter here is my newest favorite.  I so love him!

Hair is growing on her head!

 and this table got an eye leveled display

I love sitting here and read or watch the birds outside the window, or just drink my coffee here...

Then this evening…. Things got worse again.  Another episode of cough got the best or worse of me and I was afflicted by the most horrible headache I have ever experienced. I kept pacing back and forth in my kitchen holding my head in my hands, until it finally subsided a bit… I guess it had something to do with all the congestion going on in my poor body that, somehow went up to my head, and not that a vein had exploded in my head, as I thought then.  Whatever it was, it was pretty scary.  Yeah, January, boo you stink!

After Christmas

The day after Christmas, all my Christmas decorations were stacked away; including the large Christmas tree I had in our family room and the two smaller ones in front of our two front windows.  

As much as I love all the Christmas lights, I was already getting a bit anxious as it was... even with the minimal amount of clutter Christmas creates in my home.  Our living room is about the only place in my house I decorate a bit, aside from the two smaller Christmas trees I am now placing in front of the windows.

It was so easy to put everything away!  It only took me around ½ hour or less.  This is the joy of keeping things simple during the holidays. I love seeing our living room back to its simple normality… 

Do you go overboard on your Christmas decorating?  I guess there must be something wrong with me, for I fear overcrowding my house... I could never understand those who like overdoing it with Christmas decorations for the holiday; or any other holiday or day.  We see way too many pics of beautiful homes where owners love to stack thing on top of things, and one just have to wonder sometimes how in the world can these people walk around their houses without bumping into things or not going nuts… their homes make me think of an antique shop or a cozy pretty place where you just want to go to shop, but never want to stay.

It is just me, I know.  But while it may be tempting to completely cover your rooms wall to wall in regalia, doing so can actually detract from your overall aesthetic, me thinks!

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and a lovely New Year! Much happiness to you, and yours!

Life memories

And thus we waited for days to come and before you know it they are upon us… days come and just with the swiftness in which they come, they are gone too… gone in a blink of an eye, leaving us with only memories of what they brought, to add to the treasure-house of our heart… 

We all waited for this special day, and now our youngest child had become a married man.  And we have gained a new daughter...

Back at home, days are short. Mornings dark, evenings cold, and the white doves came by the other day.  To the garden.  For just a few minutes.  What tells me that these beautiful creatures are still calling this old garden their ‘home’.  Home in the big bushy pine at the end of the garden.  I so wish I had planted more of these giant evergreens.  One or two Blue Spruce and a Japanese Umbrella pine.  The story would had been so different had I chosen a few pines in my landscape for a natural privacy barrier. As it is around here every winter, the few trees that pose as barriers have thinned out; bared branches exposing open spaces, and the privacy of our summers are gone.  That two-story house on the other side of the fence, what an eyesore it’s always been.  

These days of remembrances and flu season, I am spending my hours sitting in this corner; drinking in the rays of sunshine that, on those special winter days, like today, shine through my window.  Observing and listening to the birds.  The ones that always stay behind and are left to confront the harshness of winter days.  One just has but admire these insignificant little creatures of the air. 

The geraniums are all in bloom and so is the delicate paperwhite narcissus.

 

I love to sit here with my books and a cup of coffee and just enjoy the small, but significant things of life.  These are the true blessings of winter.

Plants that gift you with the green our souls crave and the energy our bodies need. 

 

The clearest way into the Universe is through a forest wilderness. And this is my little winter forest right here! 

 

I love plants.  I remember my childhood names for grasses and secret flowers. I remember where a toad may live and what time the birds awaken in the summer -- and what trees and seasons smelled like -- how people looked and walked and smelled even. The memory of odors is very rich.

How lucky we are in these natural delights that lie ready to our hands! Every season and every plant offer changing joys.

When mid afternoon sun hit this spot, everything turns sparkly golden

 

I am happy, I have been down with the flu twice since the last couple of weeks.  I feel spaced-out, my mind feeble, my body weak, I am blessed, I am surrounded in light. I have to go back to my new job on Monday and I expect more light for 2020, more hope more peace… a different kind of peace.  Because of the empty tomb, we have peace. Because of His resurrection, we can have peace, and because of His promise of a return to this earth, we can be assured that something marvelous is coming.   

Much blessings to you, and yours for this 2020!