I need to be surrounded by Nature to feel whole. My spirit and soul crave the nearness of God through Nature. One of the things that have always come more natural to me than life itself, is finding God in Nature… in the songs of birds and the tickling of water, in tall trees and soft grasses, I always find Him there… I call upon the beauty and power found in Nature to remind me of my Heavenly Father, and the wisdom and goodness that exist in Him.
Nature is my church and my safe haven. I didn’t have any problem attaining this when we lived in our little white cottage. The woods skirting the gardens were the walls of my holy sanctuary, roses and crepe myrtles the pews and kneelers, and birds were my fellow worshipers. But in these parts of my little world, things are much different.
Winters are harsh and long, and Nature goes dormant for a very long period of time. Birds and feral cats are nowhere to be found, and on top of that, we’re surrounded by huge two-story houses on all four corners. That’s why many years ago, I created this little ecosystem of a rose garden. But the garden has been unloved and unkept for so long, that now is not even worth of calling it ‘a garden’ any more…
On top of all that, it’s been a cruel January and February for me. My little heart has been broken by the pain brought by death. Days and weeks are long and there are days when loneliness sets on my spirit like spiderwebs. The worse is, not being able to feel God’s nearness when I need Him the most. He seems so far away… even in my worse days, when He’s supposed to be closer to me than ever, I cannot seem to find Him anywhere.
So, I’ve been talking to Him lately... asking Him to show his lovely face upon my sadness, through a sign that can assure me of His presence in my life…
…and I go and sit outside in the very early hours of morning, when it is cold and the only noise you can hear is the distant roar of cars, waiting to find ‘this miracle’ somewhere in the meager winter garden… I’d go out at noon too, and at sundown when the world’s lights turn dimmed and the earth becomes quieted again. And I’ve been telling Him something that He already knows: I'm hurting, my heart is heavy with sadness. I'm in desperate need of you... I need to reconnect, to be reassured of your love for me, and your promise of resurrection. Your promise, oh Father: "I will ransom them from the power of the grave. I will redeem them from death. Where, O death, are your plagues? Where, O grave, is your destruction?"
But He doesn’t speak. Not even a bird would come by to assure me that God is ever so near. Not a single leaf, nor a flower.
Then, while cleaning the garden the other day I discovered something glorious sprouting from the ground. I felt around the soil and my cold fingers touched the hard-pointed tips—hostas! I said excited. Yes, they were hostas! I was sure. But who had planted them? I knew it hadn’t been me, and I was certain neither the people who had rented our house and ruined my garden. This was definitely the miracle I was expecting! The little reminder from heaven that I was not alone in my pain and that God does know and cares.
I was elated with joy, my heart thanked my Creator in the faith of a little child… but then, that night, all of a sudden it dawned on me how very wrong I had been all along. You see, I had sadly realized that what I had thought were hostas were not. There was no miracle, only the old tulips I had planted many years ago.
How disappointed and sad I then felt.
But oh, how we benefit from the tremendous power of faith! God can never let us down. He would never let our little faith die without first proving his faithfulness to us. And little did I know what God had in store for me! I was bound for a much bigger, incredible miracle than what I had in mind! For blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, and whose hope is the Lord. You see, is not that God doesn't answer. Is that our thoughts are not his thoughts, neither are our ways his ways…. and it wasn’t precisely in the garden where God wanted to show me that, indeed, He was very near… it was inside my very own house instead!
I couldn’t believe my eyes the moment I entered this room the other day to find this…
and this...
From a dead tree... without any roots whatsoever, in the middle of winter, inside my house, out of season, without a drop of water, or sun.... white blossoms on branches I had pruned off the lilac tree.
And white blossoms, not the regular lavender of the lilac tree… white, which symbolizes faith, and the belief in something bigger than yourself…
Yes, that dead, half of a lilac tree with no roots whatsoever I had brought in from the garden after a pruning to use as decoration had flourished… and it had not only sprouted, but it had budded, and blossomed! Just like Aaron’s staff…
I cannot explain how could this had happened, other than it was the Creator, giver of life Himself to remind me that He is very near to those who believe in Him, that He is the Life Giver and the resurrection and the life. He had said: Whoever believes in me, even though he dies, will live. Although the wages of sin is death, God, who alone is immortal, will grant eternal life to His redeemed. To my dear mother who had believed in Him all her life.
For how could some dead branches, with no roots whatsoever, with not a single drop of water or sun to help it grow would flourish like that in the middle of the winter… and in just a day! This just escapes my imagination…
God never ceases to amaze me… oh, He is indeed ever so near! His thoughts are not our thoughts, neither are our ways his ways….
Clearly, it is God’s desire and plan to establish a relationship between human beings and Himself. If only we desire it. He created us so we can have a special Father-child relationship with Him.
